What does it mean to be an adult?

I didn't want to write this because I thought this was obvious and no one enjoys repeating common sense. It's like those kinds of happy movies. They are very simple and totally predictable, and they never make me happy -- instead, I feel I wasted my time and money.

Anyways, I started writing this because of recent conversations with my two friends.

The first one is someone in our community did something wrong, and I suggested that we teach him a lesson by letting him know this shouldn't be allowed and should never happen again. But my friends said that someone was an adult and didn't need us to "teach him a lesson". The other one is my friend was complaining about her teammate didn't contribute to their project work and she said if he continued to be unhelpful then she wouldn't put his name on the paper in the end. I told her if she was going to do that she better tell him in advance, and don't wait till the last minute. And she responded like, "He is an adult. He should know it will end up like that if he does nothing. I don't have the obligation to tell him."

Both of them view adulthood sort of as a magic milestone from where individuals are truly independent, self-sufficient, and free from criticism and (friendly) warnings. That does not hold for everyone. I'd think the difference is when you are a kid and you do something wrong you don't have to be responsible under most circumstances, while if you are an adult you are going to be responsible (if you get caught). The underlying cut-off line is whether you are fully competent in understanding your own behavior and its consequences. But it does not imply anywhere that it is also a stopping point for an individual to learn more about social conduct and alike. Plus, competence varies by individuals too. Some people might need more help. Like human societies are built upon interdependent relationships, we simple cannot just let people do whatever they like simply because they are older than 18. One example is crime prevention is way more important than crime response in the real world. I made a harsh metaphor here and I agree that adults should know better but how many people out there act as they should? And what is the point of having a society if we are isolated islands?

Well so much for today. To me, learning is a life-long process.